The following primarily applies to jujutsu, aikijutsu, taijutsu, aikido, judo and similar arts but can be applied to any martial art. There are rules about controlling another person or thing, and the rules are simple enough:

Rule 1: If a thing (or person) has balance and is motionless it is impossible to control.

Rule 2: If a thing (or person) has balance and is in motion, it can only be controlled if the balance is taken away.

Rule 3: In order to control a thing (or person) one must remove the balance and also impart movement if there is none.

Rule 4: Effective control of a thing (or person) must continually degrade balance while redirecting and increasing motion.

Rule 5: When increasing motion makes it impossible to effectively control a thing (or person) then you must relinquish control.

I have demonstrated these principles to many of the kyu ranks in the form of specific techniques. Take a moment to review your style and also these additional techniques in light of these rules.